Gift

Hi!
So, in this post here I am gonna talk about gifts.
I must confess that I mostly don't abide by the principles
of special occasions. Whether it is Christmas, festivals
or birthdays. If I know you well, you'd usually find me
avoiding sending any of my regards. Its all these
yearly repetition which makes little significance to me.
However, I do not imply that I hate these special days,
Days as such I appreciate them in the shades of the general public.
they merely a mark, a day of remembrance and that is all they'll ever be.
But it is in an individual relationship,
which I treat more with more specialty.
What lies in the meaning of needing to remember ones
birthday, sending regards and gifts?
It does not make your relationship any more genuine.
For, the amount of how one matters to you is not measured
by the mark of dates.
.
There is birth and then the time you will live.
There is the car accident and the eternity of death.
My gift comes as so,
It is very precious and delicate.
It is the recreation of the moment
in the form of coincidence or destiny.
There are no days.
for then the moment given shall not be marked,
It is kept and remembered only knowing as a whole,
that there is still life, that you are still living.
And perhaps a new life if created when it is passed on.
So lie's the significance of the gifts I had bestowed to you.
to dot, dot, dot and dot. I hope you'll keep them timelessly.
_______________________________________

It was Christmas a few days ago, and I was to celebrate
it at my former homestay guardians home.
They told me to bring a santa surprise gift of less than 10 dollars.
Santa surprise, meaning that we swap gifts unknowing the giver.
I was told that there were few others who would be attending.
Those who I do not recognize.

Anywho,
I decided to make a very special gift,
to a special person whom I perhaps know not of.
See, I still do follow and appreciate the culture
of special occasions.

Its a cupboard of a realms.

And within it's center a capsule you'll uncover a fossil preserving time.
It is one which I had picked up from the exposed strata of mulbrings.
It is are around 250mil years old and on it you could see a Molluscs and
Bryozoa.

And a close up on the realms.
I suppose i should just spoil your ability to imagine
and just tell you my interpretation behind the shelves.
It is pretty obvious what it means as a whole.
Everyone has em. They are dreams.
Perhaps dreams from a single night or many nights.
But the only story that lie behind the individual scenes
is that they were all thought up with the convenience
of materials I had, and of a possible solution to make.
They were all random really.


So yeah it had a cover,
a very plain one,
The lid has a embossed square
at the bottom which sits in
perfectly with the center of the box.
I did want to have more of a design to it,
But I ran short of time.

So yeah wrapped in crumpled butter paper
and masking tape twisted into a string.
I like the way you could open a present
without turning it around and tearing it apart.
So I had not used any tape for sticking.



"But what I hope most of all is that you understand what I mean when I tell you that, even though I do not know you, and even though I may never meet you, laugh with you, cry with you, or kiss you, I love you. With all my heart, I love you. Valerie. " quote from V for Vendetta.

That is a comic strip from V for Vendetta and that is
a quote from the movie. The dialogues of both are not very
identical. But I was first influence by the quote from the movie.

Yall have to watch/read the movie/comic if you wanna know
the whole story. But it was this quote and the story behind this quote
which had drawn me to make this very special give to a possible stranger.
Its about changing someone when all hope is lost.
There is 0.0000000001 chance if every one in the world to exchange presents
that you would have receive this gift. With the odds, you had not physically received it.
but significance of this gift has spread as a spirit
and stranger it is too given to you.

To clear things up, my former homestay guardian received it,
and they are definitely no strangers, and I was very happy that they did.
But still the idea stays, which I had before making the gift,
that i was not aware that I would give to someone I know.
And that meaning which although they wouldn't know,
should still lie in the deeply in that box.

I received a gnome and I really like it a lot.
I like random things that make little sense.
the candle is mine btw, just wanted some
feel from the middle ages.
It was that time when we were opening presents
that was really fun, because everyone received some
absurd and obscene gifts. My gnome farts btw.

improvising

I was making a gift for this santa surprise thing.
the object consist of different realms which
were thought of spontaneously while making.
The last realm came to me at the last minute
in which i needed some cotton to represent.
I also needed a nice string to wrap the gift.
it was already Christmas and I hadn't much time.
I went down to the nearest mall, closed.
then went to the most well known mall in this town, closed.
those were few hours gone to waste.
Desperately, I still needed those 2 materials.

Noiselessly, I came back home to my room.
and without notice,
STAB!

The pillow bleeds of cotton.
A necessary sacrifice.
I collected what was needed and continued
crafting my gift.

Finally, wrapping, I had no intend to use any cello tape to stick the wrapping together.
old school style ya know. I just wanted a plain string like those in candles.
So improvising with what I had, I turned my masking tape into
a textured string. The beauty of old school lies in the imperfections.

Back to topic of the how I got in to this situation.
I had no idea shopping centers so lifelessly close
during Christmas here. Back home, Christmas
or any other special holidays would be its most
vibrant and occupied. O well, lesson learned.

I'll show u the gift I made tomorrow,
and for now u get to see the mess i made.
tata.

MEGAFORCE

music videos directed by Megaforce.

there's a party going on in my head
and no one is invited.

Morning.
I painted raspberry jelly on my bread,
uniting another of peanut butter spread.
That synthetic peanut butter jelly bread,
was never seen again.

Anyways,
Ive been walking around my neighborhood a lot.
I've been looking at many houses and their door steps.
Door steps. I put the catalogs on their door steps.
I collect the catalogs from their door steps.
And I get paid.

Houses and houses
walking and walking
so many houses
and walking.
hello. I walk up to your house.
and I put a catalog on your doorstep

next house.

bla.
and bla.

Some of em houses doorsteps are really far in.
I have to go through the yard, go down a slope
or up some stairs. Caught in spider webs.
And ya know, my catalog company is the only
one who desires for their distributors to
enter into ones property and place their
catalogs on the shelter of the customers doorstep.

I had always been afraid of misunderstanding or grumpy
occupants who hates junk mail. I imagined my self sprinting
for my life and dodging shotgun bullets by a grumpy man in pajamas.
"Get away from my house you rottin toothin No good dirty soneovabitch!
And stay out!"

But meanwhile, im still trying to look for a better job.
I've been spamming on applications.
I've officially worked 2 different jobs already.

Its late and im weary.
The pictures and their unusual effect
would perhaps suggest I was 2 places at once.not.

houses is rows always reminds me of street spirit
& no surprises.


Today, ive been collecting the shit I gave out. I do 300x2 a week.
Collecting is lame, some ppl don't leave it outside their house.
I have to knock on the door and ask for it. Or I would have to come
back for it again. No fair, newspaper distributors put their
newspapers in the mailbox and its someone elses problem.
Not that im complaining but my job is definitely more interesting
since I am able to interact. But, its the shit pay. i get a third of em newspaper ppl.
This is the last of my distributing cycle. Ill do no more.

walking walking walking
Summer, there are bugs and i like bugs.
But, there is an ongoing war during this time
between the humans, mosquitoes and flies.
I've been pierced much during this epic battle
and many mosquitoes have lost their lives.
I heard of a great idea somewhere some time ago
about using mosquitoes to inject vitamins or medication.
speaking of happy mosquito bites.

I have me mp3 to entertain me.
And some days I am scourged by the sun.
some days I am blown a breeze out a cloud.
In its shade, it shelters me.
This is my first summer.
They say strangely this year is chillier.

Shh...Nobodys Home

This house is so long
I feel I could call
and hear me echo back.

I cooked beef curry tonight.

runaway spider

I finally found my spider again.
Caught perching on a wall at the other end of the house.
It escaped a week ago. N i thought it would have already snuck out the house.
I bet it was hungry.
But while I was building its new ideal confinement,
It scurried away from me again.
the third time it got away.
It should be somewhere in the living now.

The temporary fortress to conceal spider. Made quickly using an envelope.


Spider gone. Incomplete spider jail paradise.



Spider before escape, perching on one of my fossils. I thought it might like some textile touches.


Its a huntsman spider.
My friends gave it to me on the aftermath of their violent encounter.
She was in the shower when spider bestrode her and buried its fangs in her.
Huntsman spiders are infamous for their painful bites.
However, their venom is not very threatening to humans.
The spider was caught and they together adjourned to a hospital.
After finding out that she wasn't gonna die.
She gave it to me :)

It would have been such a waste if
her discomfort was expressed on the guilty spider
and in result, its merciless execution.


Excited I was, my first pet spider. a worthy size. It was HUGE(see thumb comparison?).
Spiders back home-home were microscopic.


I thought it'd be a great opportunity to analyze spider behavior. Although not as obvious as some other spiders, based on assumptions and research I'd say this one is female. See the picture? Non bulb pedipalps(no testicles). u see the small dot above the triangular pattern thingy? vagina.



It was given to me in a posh plastic container.
Instead of a matching lid,
they used taped a piece of paper poked with holes.
The huntsman now unable to hunt,
I had to serve the captive spider.
It was left in its dwelling for a week
until I though I make a more soundly one.


Like all spiders, they have an appetite for invertebrates. Went fishing for some in the backyard. Found this really pretty one(Green Fiddler Beetle). The picture is whats left of its splendor. The spider was a butcher.




I guess the spider had sensed that I was to
cast it to its doomed concealment for a lifetime.
That's why in its resistance, it fled from me.
I usually oppose to confine animals for personal delight.
Because nothing deserves such a faith.
But i was so happy. Big cool Spider! dangerousssss!
Ah, but somewhere in me too
there was a sense of regret that in honor my little spider
I had ought to rightfully let it go
than to have it leave in the frights of me.

WAKE

the first entry. A sealed occurrence to a life of any sort to bear a beginning. The same repetitive birth to bestow upon all living beings and in this case, a blog. An introduction, a greeting, an aim. I have always admire the dreamlike nature, where there is no form of a start. To be cast in to a random portrait, a translucent experience which tend to go on with the absence of aim. Time could sink through the narrow glass slit, but only if it is possible to be aware of its existence. The placelessness and the timelessness becomes the state of immortal existence. It could take me. And I'd be fine in this moonlit sleep forever.

Asleep, bodiless in the absence.
Do you remember your state of nucleus?

I know I had not remember the time of birth. But, there was a beginning to my memory that had been illustrated so distinctively. My life begun roughly 3 years after I was born. My first memory. I remembered deliriously waking up to an animated glare, illuminating through the flowery barred windows. It was framed through the gap of pink glowing curtains that still confined the shade in the room. From my chest, the blood streamed hurriedly through me and I stretched this new obedient body in which had seem so familiar. I could not remember how the bed felt, but i could only imagine its touch had blanketed me, as ruthless the tides of the sea. I know of nothing else which existed beyond that. So, then laid pieces that still lingered and the most that went astray. And there is now.

And so mark the beginning of this blog.
It was a spark that came to me. To maybe write something here daily. With all this theme, style, original art work and stuff floating around the original blog, it had been sorta intimidating to add any ordinary variety. I guess I had only wanted its purity to remain. So, in this fresh realm I thought, I could write about the casual things. Hopefully capturing the details of my daily observation, inspiration and laying them here. This blog here, unlike the collaborative lear, didi, shadow and my fictionaddiction, would desirably be more down to earth...ok? ok. everyday I said. The obviousness of ordinary daily life is easier to write. Need to force self to be more spontaneous.